A Tough Reality

Tomorrow will make a week of my summer here at Oak Ranch.  The time has flown by and it definitely doesn't feel like I have been here that long.  However, that doesn't mean that I have not grown attached to these girls...I know surprising right :).  Last week I really got to know the five young ladies and some of the pieces that have fallen around them.  Then on Friday we loaded them up in cars with people who had a role in pulling apart those very pieces.  We smiled and said "have a good weekend" while trying to do the right thing -- be forgiving and non-judgmental.  These past couple of days we have spent our time trying to pick them back up and boy has it been tough. 

All weekend I couldn't get this out of my head, I kept running the stories over and over in my head trying to make everything fit.  Come Monday when all of them were back, the amount of frustration and tension was simply overwhelming.  I will have to say that this has been a tough reality for me and it's something that I foresee being the biggest challenge of my summer.  I really had to give credit to the workers who are here week in and out as they hold their heads high by the Grace of God and become role models for these hurting young people and families.  The unique thing about Baptist Children's Home is that they work to heal the child as well as help the family.  Their ultimate goal for each child is to have them back with their families. This differs from most other foster care programs in that they only 'treat' the child and not the root of most of the issues, the family. 

I really am excited and glad to be working here, besides all the feed buckets and horses I have to ride, this shouldn't be too bad of a summer.  :)  While everyone is still in school I have been spending my days at the barn working horses, trail riding, feeding goats and well pretty much anything else there is to do.  Hopefully in another week I'll be working more closely with both the horses and the students as they work to overcome their issues and find God amongst the rubble. Today, I got to do my first bible study/devotion with both the girls and boys so we went through the first book of Daniel and talked about his courage and how he was able to be true to his faith in challenging situations.  I am most definitely going to get some good classroom management skills with this group and they are keeping me on my toes with each lesson I share. 

I appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers so for this week I ask that you help me be able to work with the guys and learn how to connect with them more.  Please pray that I do not get overwhelmed with lack of knowledge of the situations each young man is in and that I am able to be still and allow God to speak through me in the time I am with them.  Please pray for the 7 boys that are here and the 5 girls, two of which will be leaving next week and then 4 more will be joining us shortly after.  Please pray for the families and that the girl's leaving will have a healthy transition from OR to home. Finally, please pray for the house parents and the workers here that they are encouraged and find patience in the difficult days.

Love you all, I have a 6:30 trail ride in the morning so good night!  :)

Oak Ranch Part 1: It's A Whole New World

If you haven't read the "Experience the Moment" blog first you might want to check it first so you'll be in order. 

On Wednesday afternoon I left Camp Caraway to come to Oak Ranch, I finally made it here after having to use both my ipod map map and a gps (which is a whole other story.)  So let's just say I was thankful to get here.  Upon my arrival I was greeted with big hugs and smiles all around.  This place is gorgeous and I must say the pictures online do not do it justice.  I got the grand tour and got to meet lots of new people including some of the office staff, barn manager, house parents and the kids.  They are curous and pretty honest when it comes to what they're thinking for the most part.  We then went to youth group at a local church.  Although the boys have been attending this was the girl's first time so I immediately made friends with one young lady as I urged her to sit with me in the circle.  None really wanted to go in.  We concluded the night with some American Idol and never before have I seen Scotty obsessions like some of these ladies. 

On Thursday I got to sit in on some Therapeutic Crisis Intervention Training, I never knew this type stuff existed...wow is all I have to say.   Afterwards I headed off to the barn where I got introduced to the 8 horses and went on a ride with the barn manager.  During lunch I learned more about the 5 girls and how to best work with them before driving to the bus stop.  Three of the girls are in high school and 2 are in middle school.  The girls had their riding lessons that afternoon where they worked on stretching and balance on the horse while holding good posture.  I wish I had known some of these things a long time ago!  I also got to do my first devotion with the girls.  We talked about having 'burrs' under our saddle and the things that irritate us and looked at Psalms 139:23-24 for ways to give those burrs back to God and help us to have self-control.  They said they enjoyed it so I've been working on another for when they all get back to OR.  We concluded the day with a walk down to the Cape Fear River.  It is a beautiful place and I couldn't help but think of ideas for things to do down there. 

Friday was a fairly eventful day as we started with some a visit from an older adult disabled group who came to ride horses.  They were a lot of fun to be around and they really responded to the horses.  They also got to see the 'olympic' goats nelly and cocoa as they ran, hopped and vaulted around the barn.  They also got to see a baby bird that was injured by a dog and our barn manager was rescuing.  I then became the 'rescuer' as we used the boys vermicomposting (worm compost) as a source of food.  It tried flying away yesterday afternoon so we let it go and hoped for the best.  All of the girls but one went home for the long weekend so last night we drove into Fayetteville to eat Thai and watch Rango.  Couponmom and restaurant.com is where the families can get coupons to go out to eat and it has really saved them lots of money.  When you have at least 7 girls, 2 house parents and an intern meals can be expensive. 

Today should be a pretty lazy day with the rain and only 1 guy and 1 girl here at the ranch for the weekend. Yesterday one of the horses cut himself at the barn before riding so this weekend I get to play Dr. with him.  I am unable to get on facebook or email from the OR computers so if I'm not responding that's why, but thanks for thinking of me!

This coming week please pray for the young ladies I am working with as they come from home back to OR.  That I'm able to get to know them and the guys better and that I am able to find devotions and bible studies that God is able to speak to them through.   Please also be prayerful for the houseparents who change over on Wednesday but also for their realtionships with the students and the patience they need to handle the issues that may arise.

Love you all!

Experience the Moment

This is one I wrote on Wednesday, sorry for the delay :)

This past week I have been with about 29 other college students training to be Summer Missionaries.  We have covered topics from picture 101 to conflict management.  I was able to get to know these students and see the vast array of God given gifts and talents, steadfast courage and mustard seed faith.  My new found friends and brothers and sisters will be serving along with me right here in North Carolina, across the country and across the world.  As I got to encounter this over the past few days I couldn’t help but be inspired and encouraged as I depart for my own summer experience.  I’m finding myself growing anxious but excited.  I feel like God is like the amusement park attendee telling me to “Pull the waist belt tight across your lap, keep all hands, feet and other objects within the car at all times, sit back . . .and enjoy the ride.”

I was reminded of a time today when I told my Campus Minister to just take a moment from all the craziness of her to do list and stop and just experience the moment.  If I recall the situation correctly it was the first night of the new semester and we were having a family dinner.  As we rushed to get everything prepared I realized that our room was filling up, people were having a good time and I saw a sea of new faces.  For our small group we had planned and worked diligently for days to see this happen.  While I too  was trying to make sure everything went off without a bump God told me to simply stop and take in what was going on. 

Too often in my hectic schedule I lose sight of the results of my work.  I work and plan and work and plan all of these things that I feel are important but I find that I don’t take the time to actually see the results of it.  You can plan for everything in life. . . except for the results.  So, as I prepare myself for my next ‘moment’ my hope is that I’m able to not be overwhelmed with my task that I forget to experience  the moment and see the results. 

Please pray for my friends and I as we step into new identities, new positions and new places.  Pray that we have courage and boldness to be firm in our faith and that we are confident in the abilities God has given us.  We need to be reminded that the many forms of evangelism occur through the overflow of our personal relationships with Christ and that we simply need to look for the needs where we are.  Help us to see that our service is about meeting needs (ministering) and it is about the process not about the numbers.  Finally, pray that we are able to experience each and every moment we have with others, for each one is precious.

A Case of the Barn Sour's

Over Easter Break I had the opportunity to go horseback riding.  Something that has become few and far between since I have been a student at State.  This is very evident when my efforts in training prior to State are not evident now.  My horse, affectionately named Dixie, always seems to find ways to try my patience and challenge my will to ride.  For instance, over Easter break I saddled up to go for a ride.  Well as I was in mid air saddling up with a leg in the stirrup and swinging my leg over, Dixie decided she wasn't ready.  I immediately got grounded...or so you could say.  After a few crow hops and a brief walk to work out the kinks in my back I gave it another go.  If there's one thing I learned growing up around horse's it's that no matter how hard it hurts you've got to get back on.  Otherwise the horse has figured out how to handle you.  

After a bumpy start I had a lovely ride.  However, it has become evident that my horse is suffering from a major case of the barn sours.  The barn sours is when a horse becomes accustomed to the same trail as they ride their focus is getting back to the barn and not on where they are going. The first part of the ride is spent trying to get them to leave the barn. Then you will spend the next part of the ride fighting them as they wish to go back to the barn, where they know they are safe and can go untethered.   On the course back they often will get in a hurry and in the case of Dixie gallop their way back...she especially likes to do this on her own...aka without me on the back.  See my frustration.  

Tonight I was sitting here thinking about this and I realized that I'm guilty of the very same thing.  I know God has places for me to go and things for me to do but at times I feel too safe right here at the 'barn' that I don't want to go anywhere else.  As I prepare for my summer adventures (which will be very close to plenty of horses and barns) I am feeling excited and nervous all at the same time.  I'm excited for the new things I'll see on the 'trail' but nervous about how the 'ride' will actually be.  I hope that I don't let a case of the barn sours keep me from experiencing all that is in store.  

So as I continue to prepare myself for not only this new adventure but everything else in my life I am reminded of The Great Commission.  For how can we go if we won't even leave the barn.

"Go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.  Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you." ~ Matthew 28:19-20